Love Hurts

Starred review from October 10, 2016
“The only way we can get through our heartbreak is to sit in the middle of that terrible, devastating, world-changing experience,” writes Rinzler (The Buddha Walks into a Bar...), Shambhala Buddhist teacher and advice columnist for the Huffington Post. While heartbreak often means the loss of a romantic partner, Rinzler expands on that definition to include “the vast pain that we suffer in response to our expectations not being met in some way.” Not meant to be read front to back, the book is composed of short chapters in the form of encouragements and anecdotes to help sufferers fight their way through darker moments. Chapter titles include “What Is Love?,” “If You Feel Like You Can’t Eat,” “If You Want to Know How the Buddha Handled Anger,” and “If You Feel Like You Might Need a Good Kick in the Pants.” Inspired by a residency Rinzler had at New York City’s ABC Garden & Home, where he made 20 minute “heartbreak appointments” with the general public and wrote down his experiences at a desk in the store’s display window, the book captures the intimacy of those encounters with touching levity, never dwelling on the sorrow, always turning back to positive, forward-thinking exercises and thought experiments. Rinzler melds his Shambhala training with sharp humor, an eye for detail, and deep empathy in this superb book for any heartbroken reader.